D.I.Y.

When I was younger I went through a period where I didn’t want anything home-made, even though my mother was a professional seamstress and was capable of constructing anything and I do mean anything. I wanted to dress like my friends, so I didn’t want to wear anything that did not come from the store. Now, being the loving mother that she is, she indulged this foolish whim with one shopping trip which resulted in a pair of too short jeans from the Wooden Nickel and an ill fitting top from Gimble Shuster’s bargain basement...

You see, I have been 5’9” sense I was twelve and back then store bought clothing wouldn’t accommodate my long frame. My mother knew this of course but she wanted me to learn it for myself. The next time I went back to my mother to ask her to make an outfit for a class field trip, (which I’d often done and she’d sometimes sew through the night to accommodate my last minute request) it resulted in a sewing machine and loving “Do It Yourself.”

Man, had I offended her? Who knew mothers had feelings? Well I learned that they did, but that wasn’t all that I learned, I really did learn how to do it myself. Of course my mother helped me, she would show me how to trim a pattern, how to measure it and make allowances where needed to ensure that it would fit my then size 10 hips and size 6 waist, as well as how to lengthen it so as to be long enough. Because she sewed for people she always had fabric and she would let me pick from some of her choice-pieces. (this was a phrase of hers).

Of course I always wanted to rush through it, but she would check my seams and make me do it right, saying “It should look as good on the inside as it does on the outside. You should be able to wear it inside-out”. Which I thought was silly. Who would ware a dress inside-out? But like so many other jewels my mother gave me, this too became invaluable. As I went on to design for entertainers exacting a high price, and saw many a seam checked.

D.I.Y. My mother could have coined that phrase, for it was what she believed in. She taught me to be independent. Independent of the hair salon, the nail salons, the clothing salons. Her mantra, “Learn to do with excellence anything that you would pay to have done”. Well I took her advice, and I am now the ultimate Do It Yourselfer. As a matter of fact I do it for others too. All the time. Because of the wings my mother gave me, I have earned income as a Clothing & Jewelry Designer for such artists as the late Phyllis Hyman, Nancy Wilson, Abby Lincoln, The Manhattans, Frankie Beverly & Maze…I worked as a stylist doing hair & make-up for a nationally published magazine. I am very capable of doing my own nails. Yes, the left hand is done as well as the right. I build furniture and do window treatments. I am a personal trainer, motivational speaker, talk show host, and a professional ($$) Jazzy Singer. But am I special? Nope, not in the least. I’m just free, free to do it myself. You see, at an age when I was still listening, I was told that I could, and just in case your still listening so can you! You to can D.I.Y.

Something happened, we have advanced ourselves into dependency. Why learn to do it, just pay to have it done. We have become so reliant upon others. Instead of encouraging our children to learn simple skills we have crippled them. Where we used to have to be D.I.Y’ers, we have become the ultimate consumers. And sadder still, many of us seek our worthiness in the amount of that which we are able to consume.

Because I am a D.I.Y’er, I work very hard. My jobs though are not drudgery, I enjoy the work I do. I have turned all of my passions in to dollars, and all because I was told to D.I.Y.
So I’ll give to you the same gift my mother gave to me. “Do It Yourself.” What ever it is, or pick one thing that you are paying someone to do for you, D.I.Y. just try it.

Because I promise you, this is what I know so far;
You will never know what you are capable of doing until you at least try to D.I.Y. And there may never be a better time as June is Entrepreneurs "Do It Yourself" Marketing Month and in this economy the more one is able to do for oneself the better.

MEMORIAL DAY

I can think of few things which magnify our commonalities more than grieving the loss of a life. It seems to be the great common denominator. That pain from which no one can escape, even more so than remembering. Still on Memorial Day all across the country we do just that. For today we commemorate all the young men and women that have fought so proudly and honorably for our nation and have paid for with their lives, many of the freedoms we know today.

From the Revolutionary War to the war in Iraq, today we celebrate and remember the fallen as a group. For Memorial Day is not about division. It is about reconciliation, it is about coming together to honor those who gave their all. But with the planning’s of outings and such it seem to me that The "Memorial" in Memorial Day has been ignored by too many of us who are beneficiaries of those who have given the ultimate sacrifice.

So today and everyday I humbly ask that we observe the day in this way. That we actively remember our ancestors, our family members, our loved ones, our neighbors and our friends who have made the ultimate sacrifice and to be reminded to live worthy of the cost that was paid, as well as be thankful to those heroes who have died in conflicts and wars.

I cant imagine what it must be like to face each day on a potential battle field, doing what you do, knowing that each day may be your last. Rising to the call to bravely protect a way of life knowing that you may not have the opportunity to enjoy it. Leaving your family and friends and all that you hold dear behind, knowing each time that it may be the last time. No I can not imagine this and thanks to the heroes we honor today, I don’t have to. So I can, at the very least, remember. But for whom this holiday is not just diversion, but a painful memory and continued deprivation. Be blessed. Those whose dear ones have died in what appears to be needlessly, wastefully accident or misadventure. Be blessed.

Today we remember with compassion and gratitude those who have died serving their countries in the futility of combat. No one can escape to question death asks of us, but God has provided those of us who have not yet been asked with an answer.
"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted."

Let us all take comfort in knowing that there are heroes who stand ready to do what it takes to continue to protect us even as we go about our day and let us never forget to honor, support and respect them for all that they do and have done for us.

AS IF

I’ve got a question; are you a what if thinker? Do you catch yourself wondering or hear yourself asking “what if” this and “what if” that? If so then this offering or loaf of bread was written (or baked) just for you. But first let us consider the tricks of what if thinking. The traps that the what if sets. The time and the thought that is wasted in the land of what if.

Okay now, might I invite you to move from the what if to the what is? For this is, as I see it anyway, the starting point for real change. The what is being the reality of any situation versus the dream and wishes of what we’d like for the situation to be.
Some might say I speak as if I thought that dreams and wishes hold no value in our lives, but this would certainly be incorrect, for I know that our dreams, thought and wishes are what our lives are made of. And those dreams, thoughts and wishes reveal themselves as what is situations versus what if dreams sooner when we are able to master the transforming power of the “As If”.

Yeah, I know this sounds like double talk, but trust me, this is what I know so far. And if you think about it, you too may be able to identify and separate those dreams or thoughts that happen easily from those that do not. The person who is on your mind suddenly calls you, this is easy. You cant seem to get a break, this is not. Question; Have you ever wondered why? Could be the answer lies in the acting or the energy of the asking.

For remember energy is a very real thing and energy is also a magnet and what do magnets do? That’s right, they draw things to us. Things, I might add which are like us, which is why it is critical to act as if. Acting, asking, knowing and living as if, is in my opinion the only way to encounter the now peace in the meantime. The in-between time of the development of our dreams and desires and their manifestation. The as if position offers one the ability to relax knowing that though the revelation is not yet visible, the revelation is.

And it will speak in the appointed time as if on cue. As if, is a position of faith and faith is what it takes to navigate this thing called life without loosing your way or your mind. Simply act “as if”.

I suspect that acting as if is the missing ingredient to seeing our dreams come true. Lets take a look at energy again. We know that as human beings we are fields of energy. Spirit is energy. Energy is the thing that’s felt between people, that unspoken language between you and the world you live in. And there is a vibration or energy field around our thoughts as well it is like the fuel we give to whatever we’re thinking, and the energy that’s given dictates the nature of the outcome. Energy is defined as the ability to do things it is the liveliness and forcefulness behind an effort. In physics, energy is the power supply or source. Bottom line: energy is real and it is a real equation in the revelation of our dreams.

Far too often we deplete our energy with negative thoughts or actions. We may pray or desire of a thing in an angst filled energy field. Drawing to us, not the object of desire but rather the energy of desire. Though words are powerful and are creative sources when spoken, the energy or belief about the outcome is the thing that lingers long after the words. It is the underlying request that get answered. And when we are trapped in the dream land of what if, the land which indicates a hidden lack of worthiness, it is often those things we fear, that we attract.

However acting, knowing and living as if, moves us from the moment by moment watch to see if anything has come of our prayers. Acting, knowing and living as if enables us to rest in the assurance that we are creating those things or situations of our desires. Acting, knowing and living as if, not only moves us out of the what if, but it gives us the peace and the creative power in the what is!

Cause you see, this is what I know so far;
When we can know and speak those things which are not, “as if” they were, they will becoming!